26 September 2009
23 September 2009
the mailman gave us cookies today
Iris walked right up to him-- (i was holding her hand) down the
sidewalk--across the street, and he said hi and gave us cookies. Roy
is eating the rest of them.
18 September 2009
15 September 2009
14 September 2009
also, this sounds very familiar...
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/13/fashion/13love.html?pagewanted=2&em
10 September 2009
04 September 2009
griefy mcgrief grief
human condition. everybody, even if they can't identify with the
actual grief, can recognize it and that they might experience such a
feeling. that's why sad movies work. in the end, it feels like grief
is attractive, almost. <<<<I made this up. I have no data or
sources behind it.>>>>
i am grieving still, and grieving plenty. today I heard of a precious
friend who delivered her baby boy at six and a half months. Babies
don't live when they are born that early. this is also a weighty
grief. i can't even imagine...and i only lost my baby boy four months
or so before she did pregnancy-wise. So if you have some time, tell
God you care about her and her husband.
i have not been grief blogging, even though I often think about it.
mostly, it would just make me too sad, perhaps...or cry too much, and
i have Iris to take care of right now. but I know that I could write
lovely things about my grief, things that would make readers feel the
poignancy of it all, and maybe make them cry. and what I could write
would be beautiful. I would read them and think about how I was such a
good writer, and I would cry all over again. But this grief is
precious to me, because it continues to connect me to my son--and I
don't want to exploit that connection. So you won't hear much about it
here, for sure. And I might not even tell you that much about it to
your face. I don't know...I just... this grief is precious, but it is
for me and my family, not for the world. If I can tell how good Jesus
is, then I might share more to an individual, but otherwise... I don't
know. I will not be making it beautiful for public consumption. That
is all.
That said, because I know people do care about me and want to know how
I am doing: as far as I know, Jesus and Roy are doing a pretty good
job of taking care of me--I seem to, most days, be functioning nicely,
even though there is no telling what will make me grieve. I have never
been counseled for grief, though (even though when I was in therapy,
there was much grieving going on), so if you know more than I do about
grief and are worried for me, please talk to Roy. I __think__ that I
am doing okay. I've certainly never been as good as housekeeper. But
since I spent many years thinking I was awesome when I was, in fact, a
terrible terrible terrible unstable MESS, I am very cautious about
making self assessments. /self focus
How are you doing? What's going on in your life? Roy loves his job.
Iris is growing. We are moving, soon. MSU football is tomorrow!
Hurray!